Helen Ochala, beloved, mother, grandmother, artist and friend died March 17, 2025 at the age of 96.
She leaves behind a large family and an enduring legacy of love, faith and beauty. Her humble grace, open heart and loving smile were a balm to all who knew her. “She had such a pure heart!” Helen was grounded in her Catholic Faith, held a firm belief in the world to come, and lived an impeccable life.
Helen was born August 4, 1928, in Detroit Michigan to Franklin and Clarize Gamble, the eldest of their three children. As a toddler, she delighted everyone with her chubby cheeks, cherubic smile and long sausage curls. She loved to tell her children stories about the mischief and fun she had with her sister Marie growing up in their close-knit and loving family.
In her early teen years, Helen inexplicably came down with a form of epilepsy. Doctors at the time didn’t know how to help, so Helen’s aunt made a trip to St. Bonaventure Monastery. Once there, she asked the devoted monk and gatekeeper, Brother Solanus, to pray for her niece. The monk prayed and then sent a prayer to Helen with the message that if she said the prayer every day, she would be healed. She did say the prayer daily and she was indeed, healed.
After high school and healing, Helen found a job as an operator at the telephone company. One early morning, when Helen was waiting for the bus to work, two policemen saw her and stopped. Instead of leaving her there in the cold and dark, they gave her a ride to work. After that, they were there every morning, like clockwork, to drive her to work. She never forgot their kindness.
It was around this time that Helen met a handsome young man named Bob O’Keefe, who was just back from serving in Korea. They met at the CYO club at church, fell in love, and were married in December of 1948. After a short stint in Idaho, the newlyweds settled in Michigan and began to raise a family. The children began to arrive in quick succession, and before this young couple knew what hit them, they were the proud parents of seven marvelous children. Helen had her hands full, but she was up to the task. To put it in perspective, when her youngest child started kindergarten, the eldest was only a high school sophomore! “Mom loved us each differently, but in just the right way.”
Helen once said that there was nothing in the world she would rather have done than raise her children. She loved being a mom and she was exceptionally good at it. She laughed easily and she knew how to make life fun. She was also calm, caring and a good listener. “When I spoke to mom, she listened to me as if I were the most important person in the world.” She sang at the kitchen sink, told stories that she made up on the spot, baked pies, picked wild flowers, polished apples for the kitchen table… she knew how to love.
Helen derived deep contentment from mothering and felt that being a mom was what helped to keep her so young at heart. “She had a way of looking deeply into our eyes, as if she was seeing our deepest hearts and loved what she saw!” Helen taught her children by example to be willing to laugh at themselves, to apologize, to pray, to love each other and to “Not judge another until you have walked a mile in their shoes.” When her children asked her difficult questions, she did her very best to answer them with a mother’s wisdom. “I remember very clearly Mom teaching us that God sees what is inside each person, not the clothes they wear or the color of their skin. She taught us that we are all God’s children.” None of Helen’s children can ever recall her saying a negative word about another person.
Helen managed home and family as if she was born to do it. She had to stay nimble, since there was always something going on in the O’Keefe household. She had five children in the local elementary school when she was nominated to represent their school in a city-wide beautification campaign. After the votes were counted, Helen was crowned “Mrs. City Beautiful”. She was beautiful- inside and out.
The O’Keefe’s were busy! They started raising whippets for show and built “Silhouette Kennels”. They remodeled, built or moved houses numerous times, and each time Helen sadly bid goodbye to the flower gardens she had planted. She liked to joke that she had beautified Michigan singlehandedly by planting flowers all across the state. The family moved from the city to the suburbs and from the suburbs to the country. Helen created a lovely home wherever she lived. She had an artist’s eye for design and arrangement and knew how to make a house into a home.
Helen and Bob took up golf and took on new challenges. They purchased Branch County Abstract and Helen went to work in the office where she posted all the deeds in the county plat book. (Her beautiful handwriting can still be seen in those county records today.) Bob took flying lessons and when he bought a plane, Helen learned to fly too and even did a solo flight so she could be his co-pilot. Helen gardened, golfed and painted watercolor landscapes. She and Bob traveled by motorhome, took to the back roads, built a house in Florida and started spending winters in the sunshine. They both enjoyed having more time together and socializing with good friends.
When Bob died in 1995, Helen was 67 and living alone for the first time in her life. “I will take things in stride, because that’s what she would have done. I will continue to smile because she always did.” Helen made the decision to keep moving forward. She started doing more volunteer work at her church, joined a women’s golf league, took up country dancing, travelled back and forth to Michigan, visited family and made time for friendships to grow.
One evening Helen met Stan Ochala while out dancing. They found that they could really ‘cut a rug’ together and later that same year they were married. They sang show tunes in the hot tub, danced any chance they got, kayaked on a lake with loons and planted a beautiful garden together. They thoroughly enjoyed married life for three wonderful years until Stan passed away in 2003.
Helen lived her own life fully but always considered her children when she made her choices. She trusted that her children were fully in her corner, whatever she chose. In 2004 Helen was offered an opportunity to travel through Italy. She accepted, enjoyed it immensely, and came back from her trip inspired to paint again. She signed up for a painting class the very next week.
Helen discovered that painting in oils came naturally to her and offered her a way to express the beauty she saw in the world around her. Oil painting became a true passion for Helen and brought her much joy. Her paintings are gorgeous: full of life and color, meticulously rendered, with a strong understanding of light. It is amazing to consider that Helen was already in her mid-seventies when she took up her paintbrush. It was as if she had been preparing for it all her life! One artistic high point for Helen came in 2018 when she and her four daughters exhibited their artwork together in an exhibit at the IHM Motherhouse Gallery in Monroe, Michigan.
Helen tended to leave places more beautiful than she found them. Each place she lived was improved by her touch. Even walking into a room, she could change the atmosphere, just through the light of her smile. Helen was a naturally uplifting person whose gracious nature came from the heart.
In addition to painting, Helen enjoyed loving on her cat, playing cards, visiting with friends, and reading mystery and detective novels. She liked to listen to music around the house, and her favorite things to watch on TV were golf, Jeopardy and Bluebloods. Helen did the word puzzles in the newspaper each morning and took real satisfaction in -almost always- solving them. She was a wonderful cook, always eager to try new recipes. She took great satisfaction from preparing a delicious meal for her loved ones, and would take just as much care in the cooking and presentation when cooking only for herself. She knew she was worth it! Helen was serious about her health and was dedicated to eating well and exercising. Anyone who saw her, even into her ninth decade, saw a healthy and vibrant woman.
When an old friend, Chuck Berryman, came by one day, they both felt a spark. After a few dates, they found that they really enjoyed one another’s company. (Even his dog and her cat got along!) After a romantic courtship, they decided to get married… at the age of 90! For their honeymoon, they took a road trip, driving from Florida to upstate New York, over to Michigan, and then back down to Florida, visiting family all along the way. Helen and Chuck were very aware of how precious their time together was, and did their best to cherish and enjoy every moment they had.
After Chuck died, Helen decided to sell her home of forty years and purchase a condo just around the corner. Once again, she created a beautiful home filled with art, color, warmth and style. She continued painting and enjoyed entertaining her family and friends on her sun porch overlooking the lake. Many lively card games were played and delicious meals were shared around that table in the sun. Whenever her children would come to visit, she would greet them with a wide smile and open arms. “She always let us know how glad she was to see us. She welcomed us. She was home to us.”
As long as she lived, Helen was willing to embrace life with all of its twists and turns. She seemed to take changes in stride and had the rare quality of being naturally present to whatever moment she was in. Last year she moved again, this time to Fellowship Home. It didn’t take long before she felt comfortable in this bright and welcoming place. She came to love many of the people there and she was dearly loved in return.
Helen had a strong spirit, a sweet and tender heart, deep faith and she lived a life of unconditional love and generosity. She maintained an attitude of gratitude all her life for her life. In fact, the last words she ever spoke were “Thank You!” and “Yes!”
Helen was preceded in death by her husband of 47 years Robert Joseph O’Keefe, Her sister Marie Murphy, her brother Frank Gamble, her grandson Chad O’Keefe, and husbands Stan Ochala and Chuck Berryman. She is survived by her seven children; Maureen O’Keefe-Strang (Steve), Susan Marie Robinson (Bob), Patricia O’Keefe Hutton (Daniel), Dennis Robert O’Keefe (Jeanie), Shawn Michael O’Keefe (Kris), Rosemary Michelle Denning (Louie), and Martin Joseph O’Keefe (JoEllen), Helen is also survived by 5 nephews, 6 nieces, 19 grandchildren and 37 great grandchildren.
A funeral mass will be said for Helen at Our Lady of Grace Catholic Church in Avon Park, Florida on Tuesday, April 29 at 10:00a.m.
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